Social Anxiety: Are you worthy?

by Marteka Swaby July 06, 2016

Social Anxiety: Are you worthy?


Social Anxiety


Social anxiety disorder is one of the most common anxiety disorders, a persistent and overwhelming fear of social situations, everyday activities such as shopping, taking the kids to school or being in any informal environment like a work party can leave you blushing, sweating and feeling completely incompetent.


The fear of doing or saying something you think will be embarrassing or humiliating has a disruptive and disabling impact on your life, severely affecting your confidence and self-esteem, interfering with relationships at work or home.


Social anxiety disorder often starts during childhood or adolescence and tends to be more common in women. So what are the signs or what could you be avoiding?


  • Dreading everyday activities
  • Going out to work or socialising
  • Meeting strangers
  • Talking in groups, especially initiating conversations
  • Speaking on the telephone, making new enquiries
  • Talking to authority figures
  • Eating or drinking with others
  • Going Shopping
  • Low self esteem and feeling insecure about relationships
  • Fear of being criticised
  • Avoiding eye contact
  • Misusing drugs or alcohol


Are you worthy?


Shame is a barrier in which we must disarm the influence of self-criticism. It is a form of self-abuse in which we berate ourselves for not being perfect.


Self-criticism elicits an increase in blood pressure, adrenalin and the hormone cortisol, if left unrecognised it can have a detrimental effect. Where reality does not match our fantasy image of ourselves and we feel shame.


Building resilience against shame is one way to overcome it, not allowing yourself to be a doormat, but at the same time being vulnerable, requires great courage and engages us with the world from a place of worthiness.


Give up guilt and shame and make room for vulnerability. A first step towards resilience, happiness, self-esteem and inner success is to cultivate a life of greater courage, joy and love. We must become wiser developing a secure sense of belonging and self worth.


Shatter the shame


You may have shut down your feelings so you don’t get hurt but having compassion and allowing vulnerability triggers oxytocin the hormone of love and bonding. It makes us feel safe, calm, content and trusting, helping us not to operate from a place of fear.


Perhaps the only walks of shame you have experienced are usually from the kitchen after raiding the fridge or you hustle to obtain worthiness through achievements and meeting other people’s expectations. 


For few of you who are more bruised by life’s events have experienced addiction or an anxiety provoking disorder. Stop beating yourself up and learn to leave insecurity behind. Letting go of who you think you are supposed to be and embracing who you are. 



Fear leads to disconnection and lost opportunities, which ultimately has consequences on our present relationships. Avoiding uncertainty, risks and emotional exposure limits our lives. The simplest way to determine if you are connected to your innate worthiness is by noticing if you are at peace or not, taking time for yourself. When you do this, it creates a sense of worthiness and strength.



If you numb yourself to shame, you will also deaden your experience of the joys of life too. Instead strengthen your belief in healing, insight, reflection, inspiration and challenge yourself to hope and be more confident. See things differently if you fall down get back up.


Don’t ever feel like you have to prove your worthiness to others. No one can set your level of worthiness except you. I dare you to be great, engage fully in life and take the risk to be yourself.


Making life easier, feel good about yourself and develop a strong steady self-confidence visit and to DOWNLOAD my FREE e-book today

Marteka Swaby
Marteka Swaby